I am sure my new youth pastor never expected the words that came out of my mouth. It was evident by his slightly dropped jaw and wide eyes toward his wife. Never in a million years did anyone suspect that one of the most involved families could be so broken and their oldest daughter walked around with an extreme amount of trauma.
Did I say I was trafficked? No. I just learned what sex was two years prior and believed I had a one-way ticket to hell for “losing my virginity” at the age of six to my cousin… Not to mention my current “relationship” with a high schooler who was pimping me out in the summers. I didn’t have the vocabulary to describe all of that.
Honestly, even if I did, I probably wouldn’t have told because the teeny bit of information I did give was not handled well… in fact, it was not addressed at all. I was told I had to tell my parents about the abuse. I wrote my mom a letter and hid in my house terrified that she was going to kick me out. She found me trembling, tears were streaming down her face, absolutely heartbroken that family members sexually abused me for years. I didn’t tell anyone at that time that I was being trafficked.